Dr Janet Hall’s Top Tips To Fight Fair

• Make time to air gripes. “When we schedule a time to air grievances we prevent tension building up.”

• There are no winners. “Remind yourself that you are talking to your partner as a human being. Consider how you would react if you were on the receiving end. Think, ‘Do I want to be right or do I want to be happy?’”

• Words can be weapons: “Learn which words upset your partner and avoid using them. Consider your tone of voice; tone can affect us more than words.”

• On the defense: “Defensiveness is natural. But it has to be used for your safety, not to stonewall or attack your partner.”

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