SexWise: What Every Young Person and Parent Should Know About Sex
Imagine this – you are about to talk to six hundred year eleven and twelve boys at their Monday morning official school assembly. This would be a formidable enough challenge, seeing how skeptical and critical this audience of gifted boys from a prominent boys’ school in Melbourne can be. For me it was even more daunting, because my topic was sex.
I prepared very carefully and thought long and hard (pardon the pun – it’s very hard to write about sex without them) about how to engage their interest without being heckled off stage. Good presenters are taught to ask their audience what’s called an enrolling question – something to get them interested in hearing more.
This is what I asked them:
“How many of you regularly masturbate?”
Well for moment you could have heard a pin drop, with a sea of amazed faces staring at me in shock and then sneakily at their friends to see what they would do. Then three brave hands were raised (one show-off thrust his hand time and again proudly into the air – oops there’s another pun).
I quickly came in with the next question – carefully designed to make my real point in my talk:
“How many of you regularly masturbate -without feeling guilty?
Now I had their full attention and they listened carefully as I developed the concept of being Sex-Wise and being comfortable to masturbate, without feeling guilty, so long as you are conscious of the Sex-Wise conditions – right-place, right-time. As one joker said: “If we were not meant to enjoy the solo-sex of masturbation, God would have put our genitals up between our shoulder blades (you know – that spot where it’s hard to dry with your towel?)”
I explained that I had written my new book, Sex-Wise: What Every Young Person and Parent Should Know About Sex because I am constantly dismayed that when you ask people what they learned from their parents about sex they typically answer – NOTHING.
Both parents and teenagers need a common base of knowledge that they can understand and share on a comfortable level. The SexWise concept allows for mutual learning and sharing about healthy sexual attitudes and practices. SexWise is the ideal study guide. It takes the embarrassment out of explanations that need to go far beyond simple biological changes and development of the reproductive system. The SexWise message is strongly about waiting to have sex until everything is RIGHT:
Readers are coached to consider the following questions carefully:
Do You Have the Right Sex Facts?
Do You Have the Right Partner?
Will You Be in the Right Place?
Is it the Right Time?
Are You Having Sex for the Right Reason?
Are You the Right Age to Have Sex?
Do You Have the Right Protection?
Young people who read the SexWise book will learn:
All about Sexual Growth
That Sex Has Many Aspects, including:
– Male/Female Differences
– Baby-Making Potential
– Orgasmic Potential
– Choices of Sexual Behaviour
– Expressions of Lust or Love
Why Building Your Sexual Self-esteem is Important
Through dramatic examples taken from real-life case studies collected in my clinical practice, SexWise readers can identify with young people who have learned about sex the hard way. Examples provide opportunities for modelling appropriate SexWise behaviours. This is the best way to really understand that NOT being SexWise can cause upsetting experiences, sexual problems, unwanted pregnancies and traumatic terminations, life-threatening illness and bad reputations with your peers.
SexWise is an essential resource for every adult who is concerned to give young people the best chance at securing a healthy sexual self-esteem.
As Tracey Cox, International best-selling author of Hot Sex and Hot Relationships says:
“At Last! A sex education book that’s cool enough for kids and sensible enough for parents. Sex-Wise should be in every school library across Australia.”
Best Tip for Adults From the Sex-Wise book:
Remember: Sex is always better when you are sober (no booze) and straight (no drugs)! Purchase the Sex-Wise book online
Dr Janet Hall is a Clinical Psychologist, Author, Hypnotherapist and Professional Public Speaker. As a regular past presenter on the television program Sex-Life, Jan proved that she can communicate about sex to people of all ages in a straight-forward and reassuring manner. The creator of the seventeen recordings in the Sensational Sex series, Dr Jan knows the value of down-to-earth, well-balanced information about sex which empowers people to choose healthy sexual experiences which enhance their lives and boost their self-esteem.
She is available to talk with groups who are ready to challenge the importance of sex in a public forum.