Sandy’s struggle with misdiagnosis of painful sex


:: Diana writes about overcoming vaginismus
:: Sandy’s struggle with misdiagnosis of painful sex
:: Maria writes about stress and it’s role
:: Jenny gets her partner’s cooperation
:: Suzanne Pregnant on Overcoming Vaginismus

Sandy’s Struggle With Misdiagnosis of Painful Sex

Sandy and Carl found that they could not have intercourse successfully on the night of the wedding. She found it too painful and he could not force the penis to enter the vagina because of muscle spasms. Attempts to have sex were stopped because of a severe case of Thrush which she got on their honeymoon tropical island. After two months of this she went to her doctor who said her vaginal opening was small and she needed surgery.

Sandy would not let the specialist examine her due to her fear and pain but he agreed she was to small for sex. After the operation he prescribed a numbing ointment and said ‘ that would numb her and if that does not work, get her drunk!’

Carl said:

Two weeks later we went back, as this did not work. Sandy doesn’t drink, it makes her feel really sick rather than relaxed. She had more surgery to give her a “Fentons” operation to enlarge the opening. The scarring left only made her more sore. The really strange thing is that four doctors all told me the same thing – the pain was all in her head. Yet none of them even suggested for her to see a therapist, to see what’s going on up-stairs! Now that we have put all the pieces together ourselves, the real answer was staring us in the face. We could have adverted a lot of expense and pain and mental distress over this whole issue if maybe we have been referred to a therapist FIRST!’

Sandy told the therapist about sexual abuse she suffered with a neighbourhood boy when she was eight years old. Over several sessions of counseling, which included talking about the abuse, forgiving herself as a child for being a victim and hypnosis for positive programming of pleasure and relaxation during sex, Sandy was able to have intercourse with her husband for the first time and enjoy it.

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